Mama Mia Mauritius!!

Welcome to the party, Sonali!!!!
- Vikrant




I am a sucker for brown eyes, light eyes, pretty eyes, and when they are a couple of feet under water on a scuba diving instructor, with blonde dreadlocks and dishy pecs, I can’t say no!

To a walk under the sea I mean. I am in Mauritius, where they have taken us for a walk under the sea, on the sea bed.
While the grumbling husband is not too happy being downloaded with weights and a breathing apparatus which reminds us of ‘Ten Thousand Leagues Under the Sea’, I can’t complain.

Mauritius knows how to do its tourism, considering that all it has is the sea as a principle attraction. I mean it’s not Goa; there ain’t too many bikinis, or drugs, or raves or mad shopping at fleas to add to the fun. But, they do have the sea to offer. So you can swim in it, walk on it (if you have a Jesus gene), walk under in it, dive in it, snorkel, and feed the fishes all at the same time.

So, if salt water isn’t your cup of tea then don’t go there. On our third or fourth day at the island paradise, they bundled us six Indian tourists in a van (we gotta stick together you know) and took us to the other side of the island to watch the volcanic earth and vanilla plantations. A miserable Vegetarian Gujju couple on Honeymoon (now you know why?) spent the entire four hour drive complaining to us of nothing to see, but sea, non-vegetarian seafood grills, wicked western tourists who cavorted in bikinis and danced till midnight under the stars. Now why did they come to Mauritius? I mean they could have had sex anywhere.

Coming back to the much married ‘US’. We went for the sea, and had our first ever professional snorkeling lesson. Breathing tubes and flappers in place, we spent the better part of an afternoon goggling at a tranquil world where silver angels, brown demons and fiery redheads played a tango with corals and algae. Topped up with a glass of beer and some excellent grilled seafood at the La Plantation Hotel after that, we felt well rewarded for the hard work.

But, what I really loved about Mauritius even more than the sea are the twenty varieties of brown skin. Anyone who is a closet user of Fair and Lovely or Fair and Handsome needs to go thereto see how beautiful brown can be. There is skin the colour of Mocha, Chocolate, Latte, Ebon, dirty vanilla and Olive. And they love us. How many countries in the world can an Indian visit and feel welcomed like a celebrity descended from the Mother Country? The warmth with which they greet Indians is so genuine that it warms the cockles of the jaded heart.

Other things that you really must do while you are there:

1. Avoid the deep south and stick to the northern part with the beaches.
2. Visit Grand Bay area for a spot of shopping, eating and drinking.
3. Hire a scooty and whiz past an azure coastline dotted with palm trees.
4. Dance the night away with a Creole (and write in to me for the vicarious pleasure of it).
5. Take a scuba diving or snorkeling lesson.
6. Alternatively sit on the beach and watch the Firangi three year olds beat you to it.
7. Go for a banana boat ride.
8. Walk on the sea bed-even if it looks suspiciously man made, and feels uncomfortable as hell; it’s a high like no other.
9. Eat a Dhol Puri in the noisy community market.
10. Learn some lessons in cleanliness, hygiene and National Pride form a country that’s a dot on the ocean in the World Atlas.

- By Sonali Sokhal